15 Unexpected Life Lessons Shared By People In Therapy That Changed Their Outlook
Ever had one of those moments during a heart-to-heart where the other person drops a truth bomb so massive, it leaves a crater in your understanding of the world? Well, imagine a place brimming with such life-altering nuggets—welcome to the most introspective corner of Reddit.
Someone sparked a mind-expanding conversation by asking Reddit users to share the little bombshells their therapists gave them that completely shifted their perspectives. And whoa, did the internet deliver. As we dive into these personal revelations, remember: these aren’t your average everyday insights, these are…advanced insights.
“If you don’t have these problems with any other person in your life, why do you think you’re the problematic person in this one?”
“If you don’t have these problems with any other person in your life, why do you think you’re the problematic person in this one?”
Boom. Imagine realizing you’re not the common denominator in a sea of chaos but just stuck in an eddy with someone else’s issues. One user shared this lightbulb moment that illuminated the unfair self-blame they were shouldering. Isn’t it liberating to consider that maybe, just maybe, you’re not the one dropping the emotional dishes?
“You can’t control your emotions, but you can control what you do with them.”
“You can’t control your emotions, but you can control what you do with them.”
At the time, I was a young adult who had learned 0 healthy emotional regulation skills (only suppression and shaming) growing up, so this blew my mind.
Navigating the emotional high seas without a compass? Here’s a pro tip from a fellow Redditor’s therapy sesh: You might not be able to control the waves, but you sure as heck can steer your ship.
“It sounds to me like you are trying to convince yourself to stay with your girlfriend. I’m not so sure it should be so difficult.”
“It sounds to me like you are trying to convince yourself to stay with your girlfriend. I’m not so sure it should be so difficult.”
Life is hard enough without having to persuade yourself to love someone. If your relationship feels like you’re a salesman for a product you wouldn’t buy, it might be time to check out of that emotional supermarket.
“I was at a high-stress time and I asked her how people live like this. She replied ‘often times they have cardiac events.’”
“I was at a high-stress time and I asked her how people live like this. She replied ‘often times they have cardiac events.’”
The therapist’s way of saying your life shouldn’t be paced like a thriller movie, all tension and no chill. Take a breath before life rudely insists on it, okay?
“Accepting something doesn’t mean you have to like it.”
“Accepting something doesn’t mean you have to like it.”
Cue internal resistance crumbling. Recognizing a situation without mentally wrestling it to the ground? That sounds like the emotional equivalent of choosing not to enter the ring with an angry bull.
“Why do you think you’re lazy?”
“Why do you think you’re lazy?”
Then she listed off all the things she knows I’m doing for my family, my job, and my life.
It kind of blew my mind when I struggled to come up with an example.
Cue the jaw-drop and the scattered applause for your unrecognized daily heroics.
“You are not responsible for your parents’ emotional wellbeing.”
“You are not responsible for your parents’ emotional wellbeing. They are independent adults who have been on this earth for many more years than you.”
Feeling like Atlas with parents on your shoulders? Drop that emotional globe—it’s not yours to carry.
“Why do you make people more comfortable when you are uncomfortable”
“Why do you make people more comfortable when you are uncomfortable”
Talk about asking the real questions. Maybe it’s time to stop handing out your comfort like free samples at the supermarket?
“stop trying to get everyone to agree – when you need everyone to agree the least agreeable person has all the power”
“stop trying to get everyone to agree – when you need everyone to agree the least agreeable person has all the power”
Trying to get a unanimous vote in life is like trying to herd cats—frustrating and futile. Maybe “agree to disagree” should be your new mantra, eh?
“For context I had a major TBI, seizures, strokes…you have to grieve the loss of yourself”
“For context I had a major TBI, seizures, strokes, and all around not a fun brain time when I was 28…you have to grieve the loss of yourself”
Most people wanted me to go back to how I was. The truth is that part of my brain is dead. I needed to grieve the loss of myself.
Anyone need a tissue after this? Life delivered a knockout punch, but this warrior got back up.
“That my job/career is just a way to make money, it’s not my life or identity.”
“That my job/career is just a way to make money, it’s not my life or identity.”
You are more than your email signature, folks. Cue the identity crisis.
“You always talk about not wanting to do to your daughters what your mom did to you.”
“You always talk about not wanting to do to your daughters what your mom did to you. You worry about it so much in every interaction you have ever had with them…you really have broken that cycle of violence.”
Breaking generational curses like it’s nobody’s business. Pardon me while I reach for that superhero cape.
“How was anger expressed in your household growing up? Were you allowed to show anger?”
“How was anger expressed in your household growing up? Were you allowed to show anger?”
When your emotional toolkit was stocked by someone else and anger was the missing wrench. Time for some DIY emotional construction work.
“Your mom is never going to be the parent you want or need…”
“Your mom is never going to be the parent you want or need, so stop expecting her to be and being mad that she isn’t.”
Also: “People who are addicts tend to get frozen at the time…”
Words that could unshackle you from the chains of expectation.
“Will worrying about it change the outcome? If the answer is yes, go ahead and worry about it.”
“Will worrying about it change the outcome? If the answer is yes, go ahead and worry about it.”
Time to retire from your unpaid worrywart internship.
Phew! Who knew a Reddit thread could be an online group therapy session? Just remember one thing before you close this tab: all the above ‘aha’ moments will seem like random splashes unless you let them wash over you and reflect on them. So, go ahead, sieve through ’em, and who knows what epic realizations await you. Meanwhile, I’ll be here, munching softly on my metaphorical popcorn, cheering on your personal growth.
