my girlfriend called me manipulative

Girlfriend Called You Manipulative? Here’s What to Do!

Do you have a girlfriend who accuses you of being manipulative?

If so, then this article is for you.

In it, we’ll talk about what manipulation really is and how to defend yourself against the accusation.

What It Means When Your Girlfriend Calls You Manipulative

When a girlfriend calls you manipulative, it can mean a few different things.

For example, she may be accusing you of being overly judgmental or critical towards her.

She might also think that you’re trying to control who she sees and what she does – or even ban her from seeing certain people.

In other words, she’s claiming that you’re trying to make her do what you want – and not letting her be free.

This may sound frustrating, but the key is understanding where it comes from.

After all, there are limits to how much a person can take before they snap.

Examples of Being Manipulative In A Relationship

my girlfriend called me manipulative

To give you a better idea of how a girl might perceive you as manipulative, here are a few examples:

You Want Your Girl to Only See You

This is one of the most common accusations.

If you’re not allowing your girlfriend to see other people, then she might consider it manipulative – especially if you’re trying to control her.

In fact, this is an easy way to find out if she really cares about you.

You Complain About Your Girlfriend’s Friends

Sometimes, it’s perfectly normal for your girlfriend to have certain friends that you don’t get along with.

However, the problem comes in when you complain about them so much that it makes her feel obligated to cut ties.

In this case, it might seem manipulative because you’re trying to make her choose between the two of you.

You Want a Relationship Without Any Separation

One common complaint that girlfriends have is when their boyfriends want them to be “partners”.

That is, they imagine a relationship where there’s no room for individuality – and the two of you are always together.

This is also considered manipulative because it’s not fair to either person.

You’re Overly Critical

There are some people who think that they can read minds – or that their opinions hold more weight than anyone else’s.

When you act like this in a relationship, it can seem manipulative because your girlfriend is being held to standards that you set.

How To Respond When Your Girlfriend Calls You Manipulative

When your girlfriend calls you manipulative, there are a few things that you can do to respond:

You Can Ignore It

If there’s one thing that guys have in common, it’s pride.

So, the natural response is to ignore it.

After all, you don’t want to make a big deal out of a small problem – and admitting that you were wrong can be humiliating.

However, it’s not always this simple.

And I don’t recommend this unless you’re willing to risk her calling you manipulative even more.

You Can Negotiate a Better Relationship

If your girlfriend is being overly critical, then it’s going to be hard for you to have a constructive relationship with her.

In this case, the ideal course of action is negotiation so that neither person feels underappreciated.

You Can Justify Your Actions

If you feel like your girlfriend is misunderstanding your actions, then it may be best to break down why you do what you do.

For example, if she says that you complain about her friends too much, then explaining how they make her look bad might help (but only in the right context).

You Can Take Responsibility for Your Actions

Taking responsibility is an act of maturity that your girlfriend is probably looking for.

After all, if you apologize and admit to what you’ve done wrong in the past, then it shows her that you aren’t trying to manipulate her.

Nevertheless, this doesn’t mean that you should be too open when you apologize.

Instead, keep in mind that sometimes ignorance is an act of kindness.

You Can Ask Her For More Details

In some cases, your girlfriend might accuse you of being manipulative without explaining why.

In this case, it’s a good idea to ask her what you did wrong so that you can work on your relationship.

Sometimes, “manipulative” is just a way of saying “I’m unhappy”.

So if she explains how something upsets her, then it might help you to improve the relationship.

When your girlfriend calls you manipulative, she might mean it as an insult – or she may just want to escalate a fight.

Either way, you should take her words seriously because they show signs of deeper problems in your relationship.

For example, if you have a history of being controlling, then she might see you as manipulative even if you aren’t.

On the other hand, if she’s hinting at emotional abuse, then it’s important to act quickly before your relationship falls apart.

That said, there might be several reasons why she thinks you’re manipulative – and it helps to find out what they are so that you can respond accordingly.

This brings us to our last point…

You Can Talk About it With Her Friends or Family

If you have mutual friends, then this might be your best option.

After all, her friends are probably familiar with how you act in public – so they can help her determine whether she’s being fair or not about calling you manipulative.

On the other hand, if she’s got an antagonistic family or group of friends, then this might worsen your relationship even more.

If you find yourself in this situation, then your best bet is to ask a mutual friend to mediate for you so that neither person has a biased opinion going into the conversation.

Final Thoughts

When your girlfriend calls you manipulative, you need to respond because it’s a sign of bigger problems.

In the beginning, she might just be trying to escalate a fight.

However, there are deeper issues at stake if she accuses you of being manipulative without giving specific examples.

So whatever you do, don’t ignore her words and try your best not to act defensively.

Instead, try to find out what you did wrong because this will help your relationship in the long run (assuming that she’s not overreacting).

And if you’re in need of further advice, then remember that there are plenty of therapists in your area who can help!