Husband Insists on Paternity Test, Gets Angry when Wife Says, ‘I Told You So.’
Trust issues can rock the foundation of any marriage, but when those doubts extend into infidelity accusations over a newborn’s appearance, the aftermath can be heartbreaking.
Just how forgiving would you be if your partner accused you of infidelity after you gave birth? One wife took to a popular AITA post to seek opinions after her paternity test debacle went public.
She wrote:
I (27f) have been married my husband(28M) for 2 years and gave birth to our daughter 5 weeks ago. I’ll try to keep this short so I don’t waste your time with any irrelevant details. What happened was that our daughter came out with blonde hair and pale blue eyes, while my husband and I have brown hair and brown eyes.
My husband freaked out at this and refused to listen to my explanation that, sometimes, babies are born with lighter hair and eyes that get darker over time. He demanded a paternity test and threatened to divorce me if I didn’t comply, so I did
After my daughter and I got home from the hospital, my husband went to stay at his parents’ house for the first three weeks to get some space from me, while I recovered and he told them what was happening. My MIL called and informed me that if the paternity test revealed that the child wasn’t his, she would do anything within her power to make sure that I was ” taken to the cleaners” during the divorce. I had my sister to lean on and help me take care of the baby during this.
We got the results back yesterday, and my husband came home to view them with me. I was on the couch in the living room, so he sat next to me and we started to read the results. They showed that he was the father and my husband had this shocked, kinda mortified look on his face with his eyes wide as he stared at it.
I couldn’t help but say, ” I told you so.” and started laughing at the way he looked. My husband snapped out of his shock, and got mad at me for laughing at him. We argued for a bit, which was mainly him yelling at me, before my sister came downstairs and my husband shut up.
After that, my husband went back to his parents’ house to “clear his head”, and two-three hours later, my MIL called to scold me about laughing in my husband’s face, because apparently it was kicking him while he was down.
She’s also left a couple nasty texts essentially saying the same thing this morning. I don’t think I’m an AH, but I’d like outsider perspective on this.
People were quick to share their thoughts:
Character_Figure_194 said that:
This is insane. He abandoned you postpartum and forced you to take care of a newborn by yourself while healing.
ambamshazam edited their comment to add:
For real. I’d group message dear MIL and husband and say that. “Your son abandoned me for 3 weeks postpartum, leaving me alone to care for (edit: OUR) newborn while still healing because apparently none of you ever learned how biology works…”
poggerooza weighed in:
If they do divorce I’ll bet the husband and MIL fight tooth and nail for custody and cry when they don’t get it. MIL still has a baby anyway.
Gloomy-Peach4565 advised immediate action:
He already left the house. Abandoned. She needs to file asap and have it delivered before he tries to return. Change locks, restraining order…
Pretend_Carrot5708 suggested a definitive move:
Love this! I don’t normally jump to the leave him and divorce him tangent, but in this case, it’s the first thing I thought. OP needs to get a lawyer and file ASAP.
Character_Figure_194 also mentioned cutting ties with the MIL:
And I don’t think I would ever speak to MIL again after the way she treated you and baby.
desertbat5864 reflected on forgiveness:
I would NEVER let her around that child after that. I don’t think I could ever forgive my husband for that.
i_nobes_what_i_nobes pointed out patterns of abuse:
Because he’s most likely been doing stuff like this their entire relationship… That’s why she came here to ask if she was the asshole.
Kopitar4president speculated on in-law influence:
I wouldn’t be shocked if MiL’s been whispering in hubby’s ear the whole time.
Iowa_Hawkeyes4516 emphasized the parental duty:
And he’s left her AGAIN to “clear his head” and cry to his mommy. This dude needs a lesson on how to be a good father/husband.
Blondebitchtits was appalled by the lack of support:
Right?! And “kicking him while he’s down”… what about OP who just birthed an entire person, and was then promptly abandoned during an incredibly vulnerable time?
Scorp128 advised taking charge:
OP should tell him to stay at Mommy’s and initiate court proceedings for a divorce herself. His behavior and that of his family is abhorrent.
Ok-Explanation-1223 drove the point home:
So “he was down “ by finding out that he was mistaken and you didn’t actually get pregnant with someone else’s child? Tough luck fella!